Hidden wedding costs and how to budget for them

In fact, when it comes to average wedding expenses in the U.S., you can expect to shell out about $30 thousand. Head to the east coast and that number can quickly double. From the food, music and flowers, to the dress, party favors and beyond, things can quickly go amok if you don’t plan properly and—by the looks of it—most people don’t.

A recent survey of newlyweds revealed that a whopping 74 percent went over budget on their weddings. They expected to spend about $17 thousand and actually ended up closer to—you guessed—the $30K mark.

How does that happen? Even the most disciplined couple can be sidelined by one-off expenses that don’t have much to do with the ceremony itself. According to experts, here are just a few of the scenarios that can quickly drain your funds:

• Bridesmaids gone wild

  Gone are the days of just asking your friends to be in your wedding. The invite has turned into an event in itself, with many brides purchasing expensive invitations, lunches and gifts to make the ask extra special.

• Hair, nails and skin—oh my

  Beauty treatments for the bride, like hair and makeup, aren’t just for the wedding day anymore. Many pre-beauty treatments often lead up the big day, like spray tans, massages, waxes, manicures/pedicures and beyond.

• The unexpected hotel night

  If you plan on getting ready at your hotel the morning of your wedding, you’ll probably have to book a room for the night before since check in is generally late afternoon. You’ll also have to spring for a late checkout, since checkout times are usually around mid-morning.

• Feeding frenzy

  Okay, those bridesmaids and groomsmen will be there all day and they’ll be getting hungry, thirsty and potentially grumpy without plenty of good food and drink—which costs money.

• Unmentionables

  You won’t likely forget the dress, but what about extras like shoes, undergarments and jewelry? All these little (and not so little) things can end up costing hundreds of dollars more.

• Oh, yeah… the license

  With all this big stuff taking up your time, it’s easy to overlook minutia like, oh, I don’t know, the marriage license. Plan to spend 10 to 100 bucks—depending on your state—on making it legit.

Now that you know just a handful of those hidden wedding planning costs, what’s a couple to do? Here’s a look at some tips and tools that can help you avoid them:

Fine tune your wedding budget.

Yes, it seems obvious—and you may have already created a budget. But how in-depth are you really getting? Trying to sit down and create one off the top of your head can be maddening—and it can lead to a lot of oversight. Luckily, there are a ton of wedding budget templates you can download for free (yay, one less cost!) and many are pre-filled with items you may not ever have thought of—and you can add items, too. Some even create an easy-to-digest visual chart of your spending, so you can see exactly where your money is going. This leads to fewer bucks down the drain!

Be realistic about the guest list.

You’d love to have everyone at your wedding. But aside from your chosen guests—remember: Your parents and spouse-to-be’s parents have a few ideas of their own—and it’s gonna cost you. Knowing that ahead of time can help you decide on a lot of big issues, like whether to allow kids, work friends, or a plus-one for single guests. What about out-of-town guests? Will you have to foot the bill for any costs related to them? When it comes time for making the cut, think long and hard about the people you really want there—and who will support your marriage for years to come. Add the estimated guest costs into your planner and, while you’re at it, use a wedding guest tracker to help you stay organized before, during and after the wedding.

Look for online deals.

Let’s say you have six bridesmaids that each need a pre-wedding mani/pedi—but your salon is charging its regular price. Or maybe you need 100 cookie-bouquet wedding favors. Sites like Groupon or LivingSocial can hook you up with amazing group rates on bakery items, salon services, restaurants (for your wedding rehearsal) and beyond. Just be sure you do your research and check the reviews before you go. Many places (including your favorite haunts) may even match the other guys’ price—giving you some major bargaining power.

Rally the troops.

Imaging being able to plan and budget for your wedding with a little FREE help from your friends and family. After all, no one knows you better than them! So, let them help you create your budgets, seating arrangements, guest lists, music playlists and more—then share them with your fiancé, parents, future in-laws, family members and friends. One great way to do this is by using the cloud to seamlessly share and collaborate on documents, photos, videos and more. No need to send big, clumsy files. Just a simple link will do. Choose a cloud that lets you create a family group and invite others to join. For instance, you could name your group “Bella & Rico’s Wedding” and easily share items with just one click on your group’s name. Don’t want fussy Aunt Gloria to see the seating chart? You can hand pick only the individuals to share it with. Best of all, since you can customize everyone’s level of access and edit permissions, you can get as much or as little real-time input as you choose.

Who knows? This whole family-sharing thing may open up an entirely new world of money-saving opportunities. Your loved ones may see your guest list and volunteer to house out-of-town family and friends for a few days—or contribute things like meals, snacks, crafty gifts and other goodies leading up to your big day. With everyone pitching in, you can stop sweating the small stuff and focus on the important things.